Nix Non Words

by Career Coach Cathy Groos

TALK TIPS
(Coaching Tips to dramatically improve how you are heard and perceived)

Talk Tip:  Nix Non-Words:
“What is required is not a lot of words, but effectual ones” ~Seneca

No presentations training would be complete without the module on nixing the “uh’s” from your speech.  Oh, don’t get me wrong, that still holds as true as true can be.  Every day of the week I would coach you, when making a presentation to eliminate the “uh’s” from your presentations.   (“uh” is in the category of a non word).   I simply want you to consider taking this fundamental premise of effective presentation skills to your other communications and therefore to a higher level! 
Why?  Because the use of non-words moves the spotlight off of you and your value and instead shines that spotlight brightly on perceptions of you that might be being formed such as ‘nervous’, ‘step away from poised’, ‘less credible’, ‘been away from the workforce a long time”.   Two strategies:
•    Eliminate the uh’s from all your professional conversations—not just presentations.
•    Identify your other non-words (and of course eliminate those too!)

Let’s start with eliminating the uh’s from all your professional conversations—not just presentations. Much like how uh’s in a presentation are a distraction, unnecessary and are perceived as the speaker being nervous, or just plain “not a very good speaker”---the same perception translates to your everyday communications!  You nix those uh’s, and your words/message/response/recommendation although unchanged---shift from being unheard to being clear, concise, articulate and ultimately acted upon.  The result is you convey what you are, which is a poised professional.  
What about other non-words?  What other words, jargon, fillers are in your everyday speech? What comes to mind for you?  Before you read on, write down 3 contenders…start writing…(can you just hear the music from the game show Jeopardy in your head?  Are you writing…?).
Ok, my clients’ top 2 non-words when asked to do this exercise:
•    “Like”
•    “You know”

Others in the race:  “Well”, “But”, “So basically”, “actually”…and the list goes on.  Although actually words, they typically don’t add content (of value) to your communications and often take you a step backward.  Nervous? Not sure? Not prepared?  Even to the extreme for women of being perceived as vapid.  I’m not suggesting you never use those words, I am suggesting that when you do use them it is purposeful.

Uh’s, like, you know (and so forth!) can be easily replaced with…silence.  Just silence. Think of it this way, if you were writing an email you wouldn’t put “like” in your sentence unless you meant to, nor would you put “you know” at the beginning and end of each sentence you write (as is often done in verbal communications).  When you pause in a written sentence you put a “,” and when you end a written sentence, you end it with a “.”---rarely following the period would you key in ‘uh’.  Silence serves the same purpose verbally as a “.” or “,” does in the written word.  So that’s what you work on verbally, just pausing your in sentences with a “,” (silence) and ending your sentences with a “.” (silence).

So this next week (in both your personal and professional life):
•    Make a list of the non-words you think you use
•    Make a mental note in your conversations of when you hear yourself using non-words
•    When you leave a voice message, try to leave that message nixing the non-words
•    Ask an accountability buddy to be your ears:
o    Tell them what you are working on
o    Ask them to pick a time--Dinner? Lunch? Volunteer meeting? Phone conversation?—But a time when you might be least suspecting, and to listen for your non-words.
o    Ask them to give you feedback.  Feedback such as:
•    What are your non words
•    Frequency
o    (The follow up to this, is a week or so later, ask your accountability buddy to do the same..and give you feedback on your progress!)

Whether it is an elevator speech, lunch meeting, networking event or a response to an interview,

Nix Non-Words---The positive impact about you, and on you is remarkable!