Actions make it Happen; Words can Motivate

There are certain times when someone will say something, addressing an audience or to no one in particular, and the words will strongly resonate with you as if the message was spoken for you alone.

On two distinct occasions, that has happened with me and the words have caused me to change my actions in thoughtful, significant ways.

The first instance occurred shortly after I left the working world when I attended a church service and the homily challenged us to be the ones to take action rather than to be the person saying, “Someone ought to do something about…” I took it to heart and the next time I found myself complaining about something, I decided to take matters into my own hands.

The second instance occurred just last week. I was reading an interview with Nicole Kidman. Nicole talked about what made her life so rich and meaningful was being a good friend. She measures friendship not by words, but actions and deeds.

These two pieces of guidance fit on-rampers, off-rampers and those of us in between.

After leaving church the Sunday when I heard that fateful message, I was driving home, up our private road which, at the time had potholes large enough to set off airbags and trap small cars. I thought, “I wish that the people who own this road would maintain it.” Then, I realized that I should organize its repaving; isn’t that what I’d just heard at church? And, so I contacted the owners, the other residents, got quotes form paving contractors, collected funds, and project-managed the entire re-surfacing, paving and widening project, including permits, easements and all. It was much more work than I anticipated, people complained constantly, I had to haul neighbors’ trash cans down to another street for pick up on trash day and bring them back that night. I received nasty calls from folks who were inconvenienced by the construction traffic, and one elderly couple sent me out to get them ice cream because the heat from the tar made them tired and ill-feeling.

However, now we have a beautiful, safer, easier-on-the tires road. And, I was able to demonstrate my leadership, negotiating, and project-management skills. Another wonderful thing came from the project. We now have neighborhood gatherings – friendly, social, support-one-another neighborhood gatherings, where before, everyone kept to themselves.

The second piece of advice we’ve been hearing (and saying) all our lives, “actions speak louder than words.” That’s what Nicole Kidman is really saying about friendship. And, it rings true, doesn’t it, when you look around and think about those people you can count no matter what. And the actions don’t have to be big, sweeping, sacrifice everything gestures. Small, quick, thoughtful, from the heart actions count in big ways.

A friend asked me to come by and see her display at a neighborhood art fair. When I stopped, she looked down and reported that only one other person from our little group of friends had made the effort to come out, despite the fact that all six had promised that “they’d not miss it for the world.” Sure, everyone was busy, and it was a spectacular day, and there were other family demands on everyone’s time, but the look on her face seared Nicole’s words into my heart. “Actions speak louder than words.”

So, as you are assessing your on-ramping, off-ramping or in between goals, challenge yourself to think of ways in which you can take action to maximize the things you want from your time and efforts. The wonderful thing about choosing a path that allows for better work-life balance is that the lines are always changing and moving. There are ways to demonstrate leadership, project-management and other skills while improving your neighborhood or community. There are ways to support friends that also boost your abilities on other areas of your life. Be creative, have fun, and keep focused on those things that truly enrich your life.